Sunday, June 7, 2015

The weekend

We did it.  We drove over to meet our new niece.  We also got to see her two big sisters, our niece born in February, and her big brother.  Five kids.  It all came down to scheduling.  It was either this weekend or not until the second weekend of July because we have weekend plans until then.

It wasn't hard.  There wasn't a sense of dread as we drove over.  There were no tears while we were there.  No one made any jerk comments.  It wasn't nearly as hard as it was when we survived meeting the niece born in February.

She's so tiny.  She has a ton of hair, to the point where her little sideburns curl into her ears.  The joke was that she has more hair than hubs (totally true!).  She has big feet and long fingers and toes.  I got to hold her a lot.  She seems to be a really content baby.  She doesn't really do much, but it is my understanding that babies of this age don't (I've never really been a baby person and thanks to infertility I never really had the occasion to learn).  Silly as this sounds I had a little moment when she opened her eyes and looked up at me and I saw her eye lashes-one of those "I'm never going to look into my own baby's eyes" sort of moments.

February niece is growing like a weed.  She turned four months old today.  She's a hoot!  A really happy baby.  Huge smile.  The most adorable laugh.  I can't believe how big she is.  I think she'll be sitting up by herself the next time we see her.

I took the cutest picture of hubs with one baby in each arm.  He might never get to be a dad, but he certainly rocks the uncle role.

At one point all five kids were congregated around me, all trying to sit on my lap.  Somebody snapped a picture.  I thought it was so cute that I put it on Facebook.  The best comment was: "Looks like you need a bigger lap!"  I loved that comment.

I don't know why it was so much easier this time.  Part of me feels a lot of guilt because of it.  But I'm going to try not to dwell on that and just go with it from this point forward, loving all of them as much as I can.

6 comments:

  1. This post really makes me happy. "Looks like you need a bigger lap" indeed! It just shows that even though we have those ouch moments, it does get easier - even when we dread something - and not always when we expect it. I am loving the idea of you and your husband rocking the aunt and uncle roles.

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    1. I do need a bigger lap! It's funny how it works....expecting something to be hard but it's not at all, but then to get blindsided by something else. I'll take it though! :)

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  2. What wonderful photos to have. :) So glad this time around was easier for you. Rock on, Auntie BnB! :)

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    1. It's not the best photo, but it's a great memory and everybody's personality really shows! It is pretty fun to be the cool aunt that comes with presents and it's nice to be able to give them all a bunch of attention and loving. Hopefully I'll always be the cool aunt!

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  3. I am glad to hear that it was somewhat easier this time meeting the new niece. I think that moment of thinking you'll never look into your baby's eyes will always be with you but now you can shower your love onto your niece.

    I love the facebook comment you got. You're going to be a great Aunt, no doubt the coolest Aunt around for those kids.

    This is why I wish my sister didn't live so far away. I never get to see her kids except maybe once a year if we can afford to take a plane down and stay for a week or two.

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    1. It's unfortunate you don't get to see your sister's kids more often! When my nephew (8) and oldest niece (4.5) were born we lived about six hours from them and only got to go "home" maybe three or four times a year, so I feel like I missed out on a lot of their early years. When niece two (2) was born we had moved to where we currently leave (about three hours away), but even though we had the ability to visit more frequently, we didn't, because she was born at the toughest parts of infertility. Then my sisters found out that they were pregnant with nieces three and four shortly after we found out we were unlikely to ever get pregnant. So now I just need to put all of that in the past and make up for lost time.

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